Tag: T_utopia

See https://tanbinvest.dreamhosters.com/17101/ffree_utopia_carefree_ezlife/

幸福:2cornerstones #breakaway^goodLife

Posted on by tiger40490

k_mellow k_def_of_success

See also

This bpost needs more clarity, to avoid becoming yet another forgettable analysis.

TJ.Lin: comfort zone guarded by internal^external protections is a simpler, earlier version of the GG+BB framework. GG is an external driver of my 幸福. BB is an internal driver.

— /genesis/ and intro .. In Sep 2022, when grandpa once against said my 幸福感 was precious and admirable, I realized that my 幸福 [peaceful contentment, successE, fat-n-happy, carefree ezlife] is rare (among my cohort) in two ways — GG) “good life” BB) breakaway. Both are impermanent in the Buddhist sense…. but I’m slowly growing confident.

As to the English translation, I feel /contentment/ is the more apt word than satisfaction.

— GG) By many objective yardsticks (data-based), my current life is a precious good life, not common even among the WSt elite.

However, I try to keep my feet on the ground — this “good life” is impermanent and utopian.

This “Good life” is more successE[cashflow, wellness, harmony] than successC.

— BB)  there are numerous imperfections in my “good life” that are commonly perceived as less-than-enviable, but as if by magical power I have progressively /neutralized/ and embraced them, and gradually mellowed up, breaking away from the common wrong priorities of the rat race.

Breakaway requires bold, independent thinking, honest and incisive self-evaluation, serenity, relying on self-knowledge advantage.

A small subset of the imperfections are listed below. Sometimes I perceive these imperfections as character building, tests of conviction, hard lessons.  Serenity is still badly needed whenever I find my blissful bubble derailed into a storm. There have been no big storm since 2018… reminds me of the long peace after WW2. A minor storm — boy in late 2023.

Crucially for my current 幸福 , my center of gravity is progressively shifting away from the wrong priorities [successsC, exclub,,,] towards wellness [including mental], successZ+E,,, I refer to it as a bold breakaway.

— Q1: What specific elements in GG or BB have improved (starting sometime in 2018) that give rise to my current 幸福感?

  • (BB+GG) anxiety/disappointment about boy….  Boy improved, but more crucially, I mellowed up more than his mom.
  • (GG) PIP .. appr by manager.
  • (BB) FOLB… I had many discussions with S.Liu, YY.T.
  • — for decades, above are the big-3 derailers/stressors across my tectonic plates. Below are Additional items:
  • (BB+GG) marriage, bonding with meimei
  • (BB) 5/wk workout .. improving my successZ
  • (GG) commute

For this bpost title, I chose “cornerstone” rather than “pillars”. Cornerstone is secure, not precarious.

[23]carefree: how2restore@@

Posted on by tiger40490

k_all_green_dashboard

See also

  • bpost on steadfast focus

Bubble burst .. How do I repair my bubble of bliss?

Derailed .. How do I get back on track?

Resilience

— in early Dec 2023 “bachelor mode”, I was slightly more carefree.

time_freedom … I don’t have commitments to kids or come home early. I have time_freedom. I can spend more time at work and get to higher ground.

diet, exercise, sleep .. I have better self-control in these areas

Drawback: no intimacy, but so far, this drawback is far outweighed. I think when we stop sexual intercourse altogther, due to againg, I will adjust to the change.

— calm between storms / all-green dashboard .. After overcoming some pff/wellness challenges, I would breath a sigh of relief. The xpSelf would experience real boost to financial security (though rmSelf may not recognize it).

This experience is primarily a comparison against recent past.

Secondly, This experience is also a reminder that my peers have numerous common stressors that I don’t notice.

Therefore, an all-green dashboard is rare. My carefree ezlife is invariably a calm between storms.

— some specific factors/actions, half ranked within each category by note-worthiness [not bland, not vague] and effectiveness

  • address the big stressors. They tend to dominate my stressor profile.
  • more outing with boy .. good bonding one-to-one
  • more outing with family .. tend to highlight the carefree joy
  • — self-care,
  • [o] commute .. put commute time to better use, with L36
  • more time for blogg and blog clean-up
  • more quiet time … in office, library, stadium, MRT,,,
  • more email with friends. Some meet-up when needed
  • — gz .. many efforts have the potential to erode “carefree” 
  • Progress more slowly .. see bpost on 细水长流
  • [d] company projects .. make progress on weekends/evenings. Capture the power-surge/engagement
  • [o] prod support … take on more, but this may not give “carefree”
  • [d] JIV body-building .. get back on it perhaps at home .. python, Dram-refresh, FIX
  • — wellness
  • [o] workout .. keep it up. They are likely to improve carefree mood, but you may need to be patient.
  • among various workouts, jogg offers slightly more stress-reduction
  • [o] BMI deeper green .. but this target is as unattainable as flexibility improvement
  • [o] stand more
  • [o] earlier sleep.. aim for 7!9H
  • [o] more self-yoga? Not enjoyable or relaxing. Not really helpful with carefree.
  • [0=offensive]
  • [d=defensive]

MTBF: all-green #calmBtwStorm #CB2022

Posted on by tiger40490

 

k_all_green_dashboard  k_X_power_descriptor

(This blogpost may need to be absorbed into the bubble-ball post, or the blackhole post)

Scope: This bpost is mostly (not strictly) about everyday stress, mini-storms, rather than disasters [swans or missteps]. This bpost is the twin sister of longPeace bpost.

I have this vague sense of carefree comfort zone or utopia. I need a better criteria for the _loss_ of this carefree feeling. Nowadays, I tend to spend half my time outside this comfort zone.

  • One way to describe the situation is the bubble ball. When it bursts or derails we know we have lost the carefree feeling. We can call it mean time between bursts, but the criteria is very vague.
  • another way to describe it is the relative calm between (often minor) storms. This metaphor is mentioned in ##bubble at risk@derail`] storms+blackholes
  • A better characterization is the all-green big-brother dashboard. BigBrother is a system monitoring tool I used in 2001-2003. I remember it says if any system component has an issue, you will see some red or amber. If you find yourself in a sea of green then you are very lucky. When a sufficient number of reds show up, then we know we have lost the carefree /utopia/.

The most common stressors are

  1. disasters/storms .. See the Scope statement
  2. dissatisfaction blackholes ..
  3. .. (involuntary?) benchmarking against arbitrary, unreasonable standards .. We are often encouraged, nudged, persuaded to compare with other people. Those trainers do that all the time.

A single stressor [like BMI or BGC title] is often “ring-fenced” thanks to my various white_blood_cells [resilience, self-esteem, stress prevention/reduction/protections,,,], but a random combination of stressors can often derail/burst my bubble and even threaten the “camel’s back“.

— CB2022 .. A hard lesson on MTBF .. Soon after publishing this blogpost, I hit the CB2022 disaster. We can call it a storm, a misstep or a swan event. My blissful carefree life, my Almost all-green dashboard suddenly turned into huge red. I’m forced to confront the bitter consequences of pro-active resignation from an extremely comfortable job, that I assumed to last a few years.

— passive acceptance ^ unrealistic utopia .. the balance
On one hand, we often have to accept that life is unpredictable so the all-green state is a utopian condition, unlikely to last very long.

On the other hand, we want to guard against passive Acceptance. We do want process-improvement for better quality control, put in place preventive systems/processes, and reduce if not eliminate recurring issues.

Perhaps a hidden support factor for the utopia is a sustained focus on the positive parts of my current life. When I become busy I usually focus on the problems that need System2 (including dissatisfaction blackholes) and therefore lose sight of the positives.

[22]TJ.Lin: comfort zone guarded by int^ext

Posted on by tiger40490

The megaworld title headache, late-2023 parenting headache, CAD, mid-2024 work stress,,, reveal that my current carefree ezlife is precarious indeed. See blogpost on mean time between failures.

CB2022 is a bigger jolt to my comfort zone. External dependency indeed. ZQBX indeed.

This is a heavily adapted email to my friend TJ.Lin, probably early 2023.

You asked
Q1: assuming you are living purely on your savings, and you are not worried about the savings, what is your worry?

I said that indeed I don’t worry about money , over the medium horizon. Yet I do feel my current carefree ezlife is fragile/precarious, possibly transient. The biggest fragile pillar is the MLP job (re CB2022), but deep down, I cherish my wellness + blissful family life more than MLP job or other things, so I have a subconscious attachment. I worry about losing my job, cashflow high ground,,,, less than I worry about losing my health or family. However, if I lose _any_ of these, I am confident that I would survive. Remember I told you about 自强不息? That’s how I will cope, and how I will work my way back to a positive, meaningful life.

You then asked a more fundamental question:
Q2: Is your current comfort zone [comfortable ezlife, bliss, utopia, carefree bubble, harmony, tranquility,,] guarded by external or internal forces?

I said that currently, I rely on external factors and feel overdependent, precarious and insecure. Factors like current job (heating up in 2024), wellness and family harmony (lost in late 2024).

I said that internal locus of control is possible and would be better. It would give me more independence , resilience, and self-reliance. Now I think the internal driving force is zqbx [自强不息]. In reality, a disaster [swan or misstep] is often too big (consider Christopher Reeve), but if your life were to go on, then you would eventually survive and rely on 自强不息. This human will can be more powerful than we could imagine.

The more we think about the external factors esp. the missteps/swans, the more we want to strengthen our shields.

[22]carefree:与众不同 #by half

Posted on by tiger40490

k_tectonic … k_def_of_success

see also

This bpost needs a more distinctive, identifiable, less forgettable title.

When I don’t feel carefree, this analysis might provide clues + perhaps a few tips/nudges.

Q1: living my “carefree ezlife”, perhaps in my bubble, Why do I feel so alone and uncommon like “outlier” (与众不同) among my peers?

The answer is invariably a combination of distinct factors.  Each time we apply one of the factors below as a filter on the global cohort population, half (or at least 20%) of the remainder drop out. I used to joke that the qualifying population shrinks “by half”.

  • — G9 hard [measurable, visible, less subjective] factors underpinn` my carefree ezlife: (See also list in
  • [22]幸福:2precious cornerstones: breakaway)
  • factor: CPI inflation worries beyond retirement .. related to “citizenship” and “cashflow-high-ground”. “Half” my cohort across many countries seriously worry about living expenses doubling every 10~20Y, progressively eroding/shrinking their retirement nest egg.
  • G9 pillar: fully paid home of reasonable size, in a clean, safe, actively maintained neighborhood … Not so common esp. among younger peers.
  • G9 pillar: cashflow high ground .. (for family livelihood) ..  Rare among my peers. I won’t elaborate.
  • G3 pillar: my citizenship.. my appreciation[confidence/faith, gratitude] of my adopted country .. is rare among my peers. A subtle factor, this “shield” gives me a confidence (-}carefree) distinct from that of my WSt friends.
  • G7 pillar: career longevity (based on WStC) .. rare among techies [dev-till70], and also rare across the entire cohort. Bpost [1] has more details, so I won’t elaborate here
  • Layer 2 foundation: stable marriage + bonding with kids .. is shared with perhaps half my peers. I score a B+.
  • Layer 1 foundation: wellness .. (all aspects) .. Note BMI/fitness (also tech bodybuilding) require successZ, rather than “LG-carefree”…

(Pillars rest on layers of foundations.)

Q4: why is my wife not feeling carefree? Why the big contrast between husband and wife? See “half-empty” section.

— harmony .. part of successE (elaborated below).  I feel improving (albeit inconsistently) in my harmony, mellowing up, letting go..
— failureZ .. a common weakness among my peers, and therefore affects a majority of them. Note successZ definition is simpler than successE but still nontrivial.
Bpost [1] examined my continuous, self-driven learning habit

eg: My annual health screening is one example of how successZ underpins my “carefree”. (I won’t elaborate) bone density; heart-healthy diet; cholesterol control; low-sugar, low-salt; research into various conditions/risks;;;; You can never become complacent and let your guards down 🙂

==== utopian/bubble.. Many people would dismiss my (or PersonB’s) “carefree” as utopian, short-lived or fragile. That PersonB could be an engineer, an academic, an early retiree, a pensioner… because everyone’s bubble is fragile to some extent.

I still have (long or short term) stressors in my current job, BMI, parenting, investment issues,,, I still need inner strength, serenity, harmony, zqbx

Q3: level of Fragility of this carefree bubble?

Any analysis/investigation into “carefree” inevitably leads to questions of  fragility/impermanence/vulnerability/defenses//… These questions explain why “carefree” periods are so rare. However, this bpost will skimp on them.

— A very realistic “rude awakening” .. see the missteps/swans in https://tanbinvest.dreamhosters.com/12221/resilience-against-ffree-derailers/

— Jan 2023 update: Miles of Sonic team .. (See also Sonic+Sachin+Anurag) a story about utopia, fragility, storms/bubbles/derailers/// This case illustrates that at any time, for any reason, without any sign, we could lose our comfortable job, or our health etc. This case sounds like a swan event, but there was also a personal misstep (self-acknowledged). My compliance violations are also missteps. These swans/missteps are serious derailers of my carefree bubble, but now is the quiet between the storms, so the other factors feel like better answers to Q1.

This “quiet” feels like a dream, or inside a bubble, rolling on high rails.

— Update after Sep/Oct 2022 .. I feel my carefree ezlife is diminishing/declining/ in some strange way. It takes effort to explain it.

The DIYHI created lots of conflicts, self-blame, zsms about tcost, involution.

Then in Nov, kids’ math exam results ..

Then in Mar 2023, EDyw was a real blow according to the rmSelf, but for the xpSelf, Edyw didn’t /knock me out/ of my carefree zone.

In the grand scheme of things, these pains/unhappy episodes would pass. The “carefree” felt so short-lived to the rmSelf, but (to the xpSelf) it soon returned.

==== wrong priorities .. a key “soft” factor to explain “why so many peers are not carefree”. (In contrast, see the hard factors eralier.)

Some of my peers score higher than me in “cashflow high ground” or “career longevity” (I refuse to pay attention to them) but I feel most of my cohort are fixated on their “half-empty” glasses, while I tend to focus more on my “half-full” glass.

Breakaway .. is a power descriptor. See [22]幸福:2precious cornerstones: breakaway

— successE .. I feel my peers don’t appreciate successE that much. Therefore, my successE is /uncommon/.

Beware successE definition is subject to interpretation.
— zzcl .. I feel many, perhaps majority of, my peers are not mellowing up to zzcl. I think many aim higher and try harder than I do. In doing so, they experience more frustration, less contentment.

  • improve kids’ grades
  • get better job .. objectively, my jobs since 2017 were good
  • get bigger home .. objectively, my home is big enough

— focusing_illusion .. by focusing on the half-full, I feel more contented, more grateful, more lucky, more optimistic… These feelings /seed/ a virtuous cycle of wellness, generosity, kindness, forgiveness

If I were to explain “wrong priorities” , zzcl, failureE, failureZ, harmony ,,, in an essay,  it would involve many power phrases. Many of my peers may not understand these phrases. A  phrase is often subtle, low-power, or poorly defined, and my definition often abstract, unnatural and non-trivial. (Contrast them with those handful “hard” factors above.)

— life chances .. personal! I am contended about my life chances. I pursue the right life chances that are important to me, rather than the wrong priorities of other people

==== a nightmare .. in a 2022 nightmare, I rejoined Macq and was dismissed again. I did my best again, but again was shown to be the weakest in the team, although another set of job requirements may prove otherwise. In hind sight, the 2015/2016 Macq job requirement was simply too high for me, more than the Qz job or GS job. How about Ash.S in his CTO job? CSDoctor’s job? S.Liu’s job?

If I were to benchmark myself with these so-called peers, or try to increase my brank, and join the exclub, I would get derailed, lose my carefree ezlife, take on lots of stress.
If I try, could I become a software architect? Not my strength.
If I try, could I become a lead developer like Ash.S? Not sure.

At my age, I have an implicit self-conviction that most of the higher-paying positions are too stressful, with exorbitant expectations. What I’m unsure is the salary hike of a “jump”. (My EPA job could be worth SGD 160k in another company.) What additional income is possible? After tax, 80k/Y additional? Not worth it.

I told grandpa that my successE [carefree ezlife + harmony, based on wellness and comfortable livelihood] is rare among my cohort, not because I’m wealthier than them, but because I don’t focus on the wrong goals.

The nightmare scenario is much more severe, harsh, harmful than CB2022.

[20]steadfast focus@Protect` #短期 #bonding,optimism

Posted on by tiger40490

k_soul_search  k_tectonic

See also

This blogpost needs more sunshine, more Dram-refresh, like a 座右铭.

— Lee Hsien Loong said SG would zealously guard its competitive position. Singapore would lose the high ground to other countries after a few strategic missteps. I would say SG also need to protect the enviable covid19 situation, amidst worsening situations in most countries near and far.

Similarly, I now (2021) have a precious carefree ezlife to protect. We need protection against 1) strategic or smaller missteps 2) external threats and hazards

— during the pandemic

For the identiable protections, I’m willing to spend more money (+ some tcost) like tutors, relatively-healthy-but-expensive foods, nearby family outings (tcost),,. Make good use of the extra leaves.

  • protect my precious family harmony and protect my bonding with boy —
  • protect boy’s motivation, confidence, optimism — wordy problems are the most dreadful, basically clueless and hopeless
  • protect my precious wellness condition — diet, dental, endurance, energy, drive ,,, combined to demand huge commitment in absorbency + time. This protection can be enhanced at some $cost such as yoga classes and fancy fruits
    • Longevity of grandpa .. My health (more than my salary) is fundamental to the protection of dabao, meimei, ,,
  • protect my precious job — the PIP-green zone, health insurance, extra leaves, and numerous other precious features, work-life balance,
  • protect the satisfactory married life
  • protect my precious brbr
  • — some also-rans:
  • ? productivity at work or self-study? may need to take a back seat?
  • ? protect my carefree cash-flow situation. Perhaps should delay the U.S. plan
  • ? protect my interview readiness? I think I will NOT lose it so soon.

— G9 short-term factors contributing to my current carefree ezlife, half-ranked by … the amount of “sunshine deserved”

  1. grades .. acceptable over the last 6M
  2. U.S. job market .. golden escape pod over the next 4Y.
    • .. no immigration stressors
  3. marriage .. uneventful over the last 3Y
  4. family harmony .. reasonable after PSLE, over the last 6M
    • .. screen time conflict ? unabated
    • .. bonding with boy? improving
  5. blogging .. plenty of content and spare time, over the last 3Y
  6. salary and Brbr .. good percentile [SG cohort] for the last 2Y.
  7. workload .. one of the G2 short-term factors but less sunshine needed. Spectacular over the last 2Y.
    • .. plenty of leaves as buffers
  8. my primary lang@FT_job enjoys stability+robust demand
  9. —- longer-term facto, beyond this question:
  10. HDB home .. low maintenance over the last 5Y,
    • .. No pest, very few repairs
  11. health of entire family .. good over the last 2Y.
    • .. good sleep, no overweight,,
  12. IV-prep battery .. body-building over the decades, which offers protection over the next 3 to 10Y.

 

longPeace = ezlife since2018@@ #storms

Posted on by tiger40490

k_X_power_descriptor

This bpost might lose relevance and then get erased, but here I assume it would survive, as the phrase would remain in my vocabulary.

This bpost is the twin sister of calmBetweenStroms. The “calm” and the storms are much smaller in scale and shorter in duration.

Definition .. My current /peaceful/ carefree ezlife often feels like the long peace after WW2, punctuated by localized, brief “conflicts”.

Q: for how many years will I have this long peace (before some historic missteps||swan events)? Hopefully one more year. I won’t predict numerically.

— a few examples of recent missteps/swans to punctuate my long peace: CB2022, PSLE-hell, screen addiction, Miles(Sonic team),,,
They should not become a focus of this bpost and steal the show.

##dissatisfaction blackholes ]utopia

Posted on by tiger40490

The fading of dissatisfaction … deserves more spotlight and should go into many of my lists in this blog.

k_X_focusing_illusion  k_tectonic

See also

Analogy: once a while, a university (or a government) would feel the pressue/urge to review international rankings, and identify any weakness [improvement areas].

Analogy: once a year, my employer would run an employee satisfaction survey to identify any weakness [gaps]. It is a consistent fixation/focus on the improvement areas.

In my carefree ezlife, my System2 often drifts towards the handful of familiar , often recurring, “dissatisfaction  magnetic_fields / blackholes“. Like in the analogies, this attention can be life-enhancing[3]. However, it can become /obsessive/, with a darker side. Consider the Focusing_Illusion.

[3] Jolt: if I continue to neglect workout, BMI,,, for too long, __zsms__ would likely grow
even though I put in more hours into my projects
even though I spend more time with kids

Here are the blackholes/magnetic_fields

  • Edyw issues
  • [h] BlueCoat derailers
  • [h] screen time
  • [h] FOLB for kids .. a successC domain. Serious dark side — acceptance of our kids as they are
  • .. not enough math facetime with kids
  • wellness decline .. workout frequency or physical capabilities [BMI is #1] .. a successZ and successE domain
  • BGC title transfer .. 
  • —— inactive (possibly dormant) blackholes/magnetic_fields
  • [h] burn, coblood waste .. eg: too much blogg. In my carefree ezlife, this item is currently the most magnetic and potentially most obsessive
    jolt: I now value more sleep and more quiet IDLE time, with coblood waste + no burn
    visibleGrowth plateau .. is a related dissatisfaction but too vague to be included in this list.
  • .. too much t-allocation to pff/… not enough to tech or wellness
  • .. insufficient effort/successZ on stretch or chin-up
  • [h] underfucked
  • MOETF slow incremental growth .. as discussed with Aaron
  • unsatisfactory ROI .. in some investments
  • Jill’s investments .. Luckily the amount is a small risk capital.
  • minor inefficiencies .. including wastes, wasted opportunities to economize such as penalties, mrt_overcharge, cCard fees, lost “opportunities to save” at GEL, ikea returns, yoga studio discounts..
  • creep (small), splurge (big tickets) such as renovation
  • SWE insecurity .. aging, competition, churn,,, my primary lang@FT_job suffer churn or low demand
  • .. c++ critical mass maintenance .. insufficient refresh
  • .. coding drill
  • messy store room
  • not enough time with grandparents
  • meimei dental, myopia
  • [h] brank, OC-effectiveness, … are no longer so “magnetic”
  • many minor items in QuadrantNN
  • unsatisfied with wife… see section below

— In my younger years, I was “occasionally” dissatisfied with my wife (to a lesser extent, my son) in terms of attractiveness and “excellence”. See y I never complain ab%%wife’s learning/earning capacity.

This is a direct consequence of (more than ) a decade of selecting, courting, (also /distancing/ from) dozens of attractive young women, and idolizing (often Caucasian) cover girls and celebrities. Nowadays I’m satisfied with my woman, my gift from God.

I think my wife also experienced a fading dissatisfaction with me. To some (unknown) extent, the dissatisfaction was mutual and the fading happened in both directions.

This fading/waning/dissolution of dissatisfaction is a blessing, one of the most valuable, cherishable blessings. It’s a sign of mellow-up. In 2022 I enjoy our intimacy even more than our first year partly because I don’t compare my wife to other women.

The fading of dissatisfaction over my career is another important mellow-up experience.

— Focusing_Illusion can make the ulcer feel worse
— quadrants .. these items are quasi-permanent fixtures in quadrant II, even ICU
— tectonic plates visualization .. these “magnetic_fields” can be visualized as parts of the 4 tectonic plates [pff ; wellness;  工作; family]
Surprisingly, there is currently zero active magnetic_field related to pff.
— [h=mellow-up, harmony, balance] .. for most if not all of these items, due to the darker side, I badly need to mellow up and achieve a basic harmony, and avoid the /obsessive/ attention.

In other words, the attention need to be controlled and kept in balance.

Also, harmony is not passive acceptance.
— sunshine .. I often feel one of these items is /deprived/ of sunshine, leading to a fake sense of /crisis/. Serenity and harmony needed.
— plowback .. related to insecurity and sense of impermanence. I often feel an urge to plowback and save my current carefree ezlife in a battery, but the battery and the plowback is usually /imperfect/
— 4 def of success .. is a good framework

bubble at risk@derail`] storm+blackhole

Posted on by tiger40490

 

k_bedBug_wisdom  k_tectonic

In this blog, I’m trying to combine several visual metaphors. The success (or lack thereof) of the “combining” fundamentally determines the longevity of this blogpost. The more visual, the more memorable, the longer I will use this blogpost, relative to the many similar blogposts.

This blogpost is more /near-horizon/ than the “ffree” blogposts, because carefree is temporary, and always relative to other people’s lives as we see them.

Now the metaphors — With my carefree /utopian/ bliss, I feel like operating inside a gigantic bubble ball [complete bliss]  rolling on parallel rail_tracks [smooth sailing]. These big and small rails are a physical reminder of the passage of time. An “ezlife” phase is often the calm_between_the_storms [storms being more massive, more disrruptive]… Along the tracks, there are several recurring dissatisfaction magnetic_fields [blackholes .. recurring forces of gravity]… My bubble experiences reduced/improved friction only when rolling ON the rails so derailing (often due to blackholes or storms) would test the robust defenses of my bubble on various areas of resilience and areas_of_vulnerability, i.e. the trouble_spots. 

There are also firewalls between the rails, around the blackholes, or firewalls for storm protection. Firewalls serve to contain or isolate a hazard.

As we grow older (the defining backdrop of this blogpost), we hit minor storms many times a year, and get partially derailed on some tracks, esp. in terms of wellness… So your gigantic bubble is damaged at the affected trouble_spot.

On other tracks such as pff, your bubble has deep defenses, so derailment is partial, and your bubble is /weathered/ but largely intact. When my bubble ball is rolling on cashflow high ground, it is protected against one type of storm, and one type of blackhole i.e. cashflow stress.

— ##rich metaphors for utopia .. We can pick one metaphor to focus on for a month. For comparison, see also the strike-out.

  • rude awakening (dream);
  • utopia;
  • losing high ground;
  • precarious pillars .. described in TJ.Lin
  • smooth sailing (storms)
  • calm between storms
  • long peace after WW2 .. coming to an end someday
  • all-green dashboard .. impermanent
  • MTBF
  • (described in the current bpost) bubble burst; derailer; blackhole; calm between storms;

Burst of bubble is a transition from complete bliss to imperfect real life.

eg of “storms” and bubble (rather than a blackhole or derailer): Despite the fierce storms, SG as a nation is an exceptional bubble, with vulnerabilities in terms of geopolitical tension, racial, climate, birth-rate/aging, water resource,,,

— If I put my carefree ezlife “bubble” into the bubble_pool of my cohort, I feel my bubble stands out: (I retain this section here, inside this blogpost to increase the laser energy allocated to this visual metaphor.)

  • the most rare element .. my breakaway (from the Chinese middle class) in terms of exclub, burn rate
  • the most temporary side of my carefree bubble .. current job .. income, WorkLifeBal [workload, timelines, hours, blogg access], commute,,
  • the most $$valuable side of my ezlife bubble .. career longevity. With my passport to this WSC harbor, my bubble is partially protected against the storms, and I keep my hope for career longevity.
  • the least celebrated, least recognized [highest actualValue/recognizedValue ratio]  but important side of my blissful bubble .. the fading dissatisfaction with my woman
  • the most vulnerable side of my carefree bubble .. family harmony. family: important to xpSelf+rmSelf@@ explains why I think wellness is more fundamental.
  • the most important side of my ezlife bubble .. wellness is the core and stabilizer of my bubble.
  • the most visible side of my ezlife bubble .. barebones ffree [brbr, NNIA, career longevity,,]

==== G3 trouble_spots ..
Beware othRisk — Most of the major identifiable derailers are probably listed in other blogposts already.
[s=specific item. In this and other blogposts, I really value specific rather than “accurate” domain descriptor that are inevitably high-level]
[r=small derailers that are likely recurring. Probably a matter of “when”, not “if”]
[w=swans, either black or white]
[m=strategic missteps ]
— trouble_spot: [rs] ED .. (or toothache?).. easily derailed, so I need a firewall to contain the psychological damage.
I need serenity + zqbx (active mgmt)
(Some may classify ED as a storm or derailer event, but in this blogpost, I would rather classify it as a trouble_spot. It’s not a dissatisfaction blackhole!)
— trouble_spot: family harmony .. bonding with boy; stable marriage
[m] I often lose my cool. It threatens the bubble of /harmony/.
[s] Wife often loses her cool over screen time.
boy’s bmark (I didn’t say “academic”) performance often threatens family harmony
me over-reacting and hurting a loved one, esp. ahboy
— trouble_spot: [rs] PIP .. (including bonus stigma) a real risk and vulnerability once I leave the MLP bubble, an inner bubble within my gigantic bubble.

This derailer is #1 heaviest. I recall the GS/Macq/OC/Stirt devastating experiences. For Sachin, the increased work stress under a “bad boss” (like PIP) was the next storm and the next derailer.

As to ffree state-of-mind… Can I feel comfortable about a SGD 3k-4k family burn rate? The more comfortable, the more cool confidence in my livelihood and my barebones ffree.

With this storm/derailer/trouble_spot, I need serenity more than zqbx.

(Note investment derailers are always much smaller than PIP. )

~~ related trouble_spot: tech IV .. If no PIP, then job search obstacles (Re Deepak, CSY, JackZhang, Pinsky, Raymond) would be the next biggest derailer. I would feel trapped and unwanted. Obstacles include tech churn, age discrimination,,, Luckily, these obstacles (and storms) are mostly visible and never hidden.

In a massive storm my NNIA + severance package would be a huge cushion. See 3stressors: FOMO^PIP^ livelihood[def]

WSC IV is the main (defensive) battlefield for my career longevity. Over the decades, I have built up defenses in depth, and once I fall off the rails I could get back. I need zqbx more than serenity.
====
— Now some of the high-level (vague) items, or past, minor items, half ranked by frequency and magnitude

  1. trouble_spot: [rs] BMI .. I want deep green zone i.e. deep defense. When I get derailed, I need serenity then a lot of zqbx.
  2. trouble_spot: [rs] meimei’s dental and eyesight issues (abated/subsided), and other health issues in a family member like grandparents
  3. trouble_spot: [mrs] lost retainer , or more costly items
  4. trouble_spot: [rsw] bed bugs, or other things broken at home. Serenity required in this white swan storm. Mosquitos are much smaller as a trouble_spot.
  5. trouble_spot: [rsw] blogg siteblock, or other blogg infrastructure components outside office
  6. trouble_spot: reno headaches.
  7. trouble_spot: [sw] investment woes .. like the HY/PE (white swan). I blogged about oversized losses in ##[19]random derailers@ffree
  8. trouble_spot: [sw] losing access to office… This black swan derailer did disrupt my blissful bubble. For grandma, losing access to swimming pool was a derailer to her satisfactory life. Zqbx (adjustment) needed.
  9. trouble_spot: [s] Rbh unusable. Need more zqbx than serenity. Need to find alternatives.at
  10. trouble_spot: [s] substance abuse and other 成长 problems… See ##[19]random derailers@ffree
  11. trouble_spot: MLP compliance breach

— Many of the above items are exaggerated imaginations of Potential derailers! My current carefree phase has lasted more than 3 years since late 2018…. Question: excluding the minor derailers, what are the actual derailers /recorded/, based on recorded events, not forecasts, not imagination, not sentiments?

  • brief derailer: MLP compliance swan events
  • brief derailer: RTO and other lockdown pains. Too many…. Recorded in other blogposts.
  • boy’s math weakness
  • Erection, BMI
  • In terms of sentiments I did worry about PIP for a few days, without any trigger whatsoever!

— countless everyday caution (habits)..  Babies learn to protect their heads and toes while crawling. Likewise, as my bubble rolls on, I need countless caution/prudent habits to keep it from derailing/breaking. These habits take years of learning/adjustment, become second nature, but sometimes can feel like constant background_stressors in my ezlife. The stressors remind me of the realities outside (and inside) my bubble.

Slow-down is a key safety factor on many (not all) “tracks”.

  • keep the house organized.. Slow down helps.
  • maintain dental hygiene and eyesight .. Slow down? Yes allocate enough time
  • bicycle safety; safe driving
  • avoid losing things when on the go

I need a more memorable descriptor (more visual or sharper English phase). “Everyday caution (habits)”

— Q: For each item, am I really learning to cope with this particular derailer, weather this particular storm, and strengthen my bubble?
Harmony of Serenity vs zqbx .. is part of defense in depth, and fundamental to my carefree ezlife.

NB in these storms or derailer times, zqbx often means active management, seeking alternatives (if possible), celebrating each improvement … while accepting and living with a tough situation… like living with covid.

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