##[19]peaceful leisure@waterfront park: rude awaken`

 


k_soul_search

See also

In 2020, I told grandpa that I often felt happy (satisfied!), peaceful (stress-lite),,, when spending time at a well-maintained waterfront park like east coast, Bayonne, Bishan park,,, Since then, this blogpost has slowly shifted focus from Happiness to Peaceful leisure. Peace meaning absence of stress. Now I think many individuals in many countries can enjoy the same /amenities/. But let’s focus on my peers in China, SG and U.S. Again, my immediate focus is the common or persistent stressors, because I’ve found myself rather sensitive to stress. Stress is the enemy of carefree, peaceful leisure at waterfront parks.

I realize that the VAST majority of the world population (and majority of my broad peer group) struggle against some common adversities, that threaten to spoil their brief peaceful leisure… rude awakening!

  • — a random list of rude awakenings, half ranked by the (unpleasant) impact on peaceful leisure. I prefer specfic details
  • [X] divorce or unsatisfactory marriage .. the severe cases. I now feel divorce has permanent legal consequences, though some divorcees do overcome those consequences almost completely (few “completely”).
  • family disharmony .. domestic aggression, in-law conflicts
  • [aLS] (chronic) health conditions, contributing to rising healthcare cost
    • infertility, eating disorder, hair loss, hearing loss (my mom), allergies, aging eyesight, sexual difficulties
  • [5] overwork, burn-out, work stress, abusive boss .. the severe cases
  • [5] lack of spare time for unwind, recuperation, recharge, and rest, perhaps due to long commute, long work hours, parenting, care-giver duty, long wait time on the phone
  • [5aLSX] housing cost, or poor housing condition including long commute.  Residents would presumably have less time but would want to spend more time get-away…
  • [5LSX] job insecurity (esp. older workers, unskilled workers), displacements. Remember the covid19 mass layoff affecting thousands of Singaporeans. Many are seriously worried.
  • mortgage rate hike as experienced in 2022 .. often increasing monthly int accural by $1k for many years. A rude awakening
  • See also [4]. This bpost was initially a 2023 snapshot of long-term recurring stressors
  • ~~~~~ the generic, the vague, not directly relevant to peaceful leisure, or items marked with [a],  ….
  • GreenCard long queue affecting Indian H1b holders .. often generates good news and bad news
  • [5SX] unhealthy lifestyle due to lazybones, overeating, busy work/parenting
  • conflict or grievances at work .. the severe cases
  • [SX] kid’s academic trouble, behavior, drugs, bullying
  • [S] short-term (effect of long-term) inflation, esp. in housing, education and medical
  • [L] major investment woes that threaten to wipe out 5Y of savings (250k).
  • bedbugs
  • [5aX] weight, body image, fitness # my son was slightly overweight
  • [5aLS] cost of basic (“luxury” for the cmcUS) education
  • [aLSX] below-average income, often due to lack of specialized skills # wife, Bayonne roommates… My kids may land there too.
  • — legend:
  • [a=these /struggles/ are long and hard, but the individual gets adapted to them so the damages don’t keep growing over time]
  • [L=livelihood stress]
  • [S=a focus of the Singapore nanny state, but NOT U.S. governments]
  • [5=affecting more than 50% of my peers]
  • [X=my own effort is at least half the reason for my carefree situation]

So yes most of us can find joy in a lovely waterfront park, but I’m more protected , more blessed than most of the people in the world.

— portrait of affluence .. The image of waterfront leisure park has been increasingly popular and prevalent, for 20Y+. This imagery is a common theme online among 1) the overseas Chinese 2) westerners [Caucasians]. These are two groups of authors having the deepest influence during my formative years.

The overseas Chinese authors often include the images as a /glimpse/ of their “good life” in the west relative to China. A related portrait would be a family road trip in a SUV, or the busy trip preparation, in a family yard.

This theme symbolizes affluence (or wealth) in time and $. That includes work-life balance, reasonable working hours,,. At a secondary level, it also suggests street safety, a sustainable ecosystem, a resourceful local government, plenty of well-maintained green space for a given human population (no overcrowding), ,,,

[20]G5 Personal advtg Revealed over15Y

rmXp?

def@success?

life chances?


k_tectonic

See also

Past title — How many percent of my peers have my {…}

I also have many personal disadvantages (like…) but this analysis doesn’t have to include them for completeness. For years I was fixated on my weaknesses, hoping to overcome my limitations, but at my age now I’m more willing to accept them (Kyle Stewart) and shift focus to my advantages.

— top 5 personal advantages revealed over 15Y.

  • #1 [bcL] my continuous, self-driven learning habit … since secondary school, rare personal advantage. See related advantages below
  • .. [r] see library immersion ] younger years
  • #2 [Lr☆] my burn rate best practices … rare personal advantage. See other cash flow advantages below
  • .. my expense tracking insights + capabilities
  • #3 [bdr☆] my wellness .. a growing advantage over my cohort
  • — The rest are not strictly “personal” advantages
  • #4 [bLr★] SG citizenship advantages .. See ## SG citizenship: $value imt GC
  • #5 [r] stable marriage… Note having 2 kids is not an “advantage” but a luck.

“Revealed” — because some these advantages slowly reveal themselves to be strategic and extremely valuable

“Advantage” — because everyone is trying to achieve (roughly) the same goals. Only the [c] items are competitive in nature.

— Other advantages, not strictly personal or “revealed over 15Y”

  • [Lr] English .. My English skills esp. in writing and vocab — helps my career, kids but more important is reflective blogging.
  • [c] my robust career prospect; my competitiveness on my chosen job market
    • [cr] Here my advantage lies mostly in candidate selection, less in after-sales
    • [b] my dev-till-70 plan — just a plan, but a major difference in attitude
    • [bd★] my WSC option — a rare option among my peers outside U.S.
    • [bcd] my position in coreJava / c++
    • [r] I feel some of the hands-off managers don’t realize my advantage until their 40’s.
  • [bcd] my Beijing asset .. or a property with a similar valuation
  • [bL★] tropical .. my home base in a tropical place, good for retirement.
  • — the minor, the familiar, or the less-specific items
  • [c★] UChicago .. branded degree from a global G50 college
  • [bd★] FullerWealth .. my bare-bones ffree based on FullerWealth, NNIA, brbr
  • [br★] 5/wk .. my current 5/wk workout. If sustainable, this factor would have a real impact on my successE and successZ
  • [] diet .. recent habit/attitudes
  • my (recent) family harmony, with my beautiful wife, lovely kids and grandparents. This is relative. Some friends are luckier, but other people experience major conflicts. Divorce is the biggest _injury_.
  • [bd] my current carefree job with plenty of leisure time
  • [d] my straight and healthy teeth
  • [b=let’s ask those with relatively high branks like Siddesh]
  • [c=competition goal is for some limited resources]
  • [d=active detachment needed]
  • [L=long-term advantage over 20Y+]
  • [r=slowly revealed]
  • [★☆= this (★=measurable) advantage disqualifies my cohort, definitively by half or more.]

 

##layers@ buffer|alternative|batt ⇒security

k_tectonic ,,, k_office_sanctuary

See also spare time as slack resource + [20]random list@ Protection+reinforcer #early planning

This blog is /fairly good/ at focus — focus on 1) buffers or 2) alternatives or 3 batteries

Multiple layers of cushion/buffer/slack-resource … always give me a deep sense of enhanced security. I’m very sensitive to this kinda thing. I feel our life is a small dugout canoe in the high seas, battered by the high waves… soooo many storms, perils, blows, threats, dangers,

Defining example of buffer — the past reserves can tide over the SG economy and buy time, but this buffer can be depleted. Therefore, the current term of government must use the past reserves in a sustainable way, not to consume the fruits of the previous generations and leave a reduced reserve for future generations.

Note on optimism — layers of buffer sounds defensive and pessimistic, but is optimistic at a fundamental level. If you don’t believe in the buffers, why would you bother to build them?

I wish the list below can be more focused on a specific theme. On the other hand wide-ranging is kinda good.

  • [b] strong family — protection for every family member
  • [b] social support network … beyond family-n-friends
  • [bt] UChicago brand creates a protective buffer over my self-esteem
  • ——– wellness (including mental) protector
  • A [b] plenty of spare time for workout and rest, rather than fully stretched .. to protect against spare time “resource” depletion
    • A [b] plenty of paid leaves to protect against depletion of “slack resource” such as spare time
  • [b] office — (even MRT) as a harbor with wifi for my laptop … is an invaluable alternative venue when home becomes too “hot” with tension and distress.
  • [d] EAP counsellors, Cigna-accepted psychologist, even trusted friends like Raymond … as “redundant support network”, to help me deal with various challenges. Note SG offers more social support than other countries.
  • [b] early rise — good for wellness, but under stress I tend to “eat into this buffer” i.e. slowly delay early rise
  • AAA+ [b] #1 eg: low BMI / cholesterol / blood pressure; pull up + fitness …. to protect against wellness “hazards”.
  • AAA [b] high fruit/veg, low fat/starch diet …. to prepare for stress binge
  • AA [b] on belly, low visible fat to protect against (almost inevitable) bulging
  • [b] light body weight relative to my strength, as shown in my pull-up and curl-up
  • ——— alternative gz (+ school) choices
  • [d] teaching and research as an alternative career, thanks to my branded master’s degree
  • A [dt] internet and finDev as two alternative job markets
  • AA [dt] SG and U.S. as two alternative job markets
  • A [dt] c++ in addition to java; jxee in addition to coreJava to provide many times more job opportunities
  • A [d] SG, U.S. and Australia schools for my kids. Many would see them as viable alternatives.
  • See also my “juice meetup” email to Ash.S
  • Ash.S suggestion: Consider small firms .. I agree that either in Singapore or the U.S. small firms are less selective, and less strict in hiring.
  • Ash.S suggestion: Consider quant dev .. I hear you that quant dev roles are possibly growing in Singapore job market. This could become a promising green field for my next job search. I’m good at math, with a branded qualification.
  • My intern’s suggestion: Once I reach a high salary, and have enough of the associated stress + responsibility + expectations, I can hope to find a slow-pace semi-retirement job, at a lower pay like 120k ~ 180k..
  • ——– career buffers
  • [bt] plenty of coding drill and QQ accumulated over the years, fully digested in my own words in blog and github. If there’s a decline in my learning, this visible, measurable built-up buffer would be valuable. Remember the aging Batman in the Bane movie — he relied on his past training to rebuild strengths.
  • [b] sustained traction and engagement (at least neutral attitude) on tech xx. See reliability @ effort^talent. If there’s a decline in my level of engagement, I think it will not drop to zero. I can feel an invisible buffer therein.
  • ——– personal technology++
  • multiple browser brands
  • [bd] multiple low-cost laptops for coding drill and git blogging. In crunch time, I need this backup support.
  • [b] diskHog/landGrab files to be released when I run out of disk space
  • [b] simple smart phones. Don’t get addicted and dependent on the newer smart phone features
  • [b] low-cost commercial VPN, gDrive, wpress… can help reduce stress (via buffering)
  • buy cheap but reliable furniture and gadgets to reduce stress
    • [b] have spares, thanks to the low cost
  • ——— cash flow planning is my strongest hand, so let’s avoid the obvious or the familiar
  • When I reduce my family BR, I feel my buffer/cushion growing
  • [bt] bx: hospitalization cash payout as additional buffer
  • AAA [b] wife able to make a living; sister able and willing to help support my kids if something happens to me
  • [d] MYS and China as additional/alternative retirement destinations, if SG becomes difficult
  • [d] currency diversification — USD assets, SGD assets, RMB assets
  • [AAA etc = reliability rating of the buffer/shield] See locus@control:current carefree high ground mostly due2%%effort
  • [b = buffer. I like the imagery of energy-absorbing buffer stop. They absorb impacts from unexpected adversities and buys me TIME.]
  • [d = diversification … to put my eggs into multiple baskets]
  • [t = battery of accumulation]

— defense ^ protection ^ shield ^ buffer ^ ^^

“Defense” and “protection” are more proactive, more adaptive, while “shield” and “buffer” are more passive and static. A defense/protection may not have any physical form — it can be an attitude, a psychological preparation.

buffer .. even more static than a shield.

alternative .. often an effective “defense” (not a shield).

battery .. less clear. Definitely a form of defense. Not a static shield.

Note that a buffer, shield, and esp. a battery all require periodic /reinforcement/, therefore never “100%” static.

(unsophisticated)optimist #America

k_detach

America, as they call it, is the land of optimism, and America also happens to have the strongest, most vibrant economy.

I now enjoy an unsophisticated optimism about my shields, about my personal attributes (rather than luck), my winning bets

Now, the optimism in these blogposts are concrete (rather than abstract), unsophisticated, often superficial, possibly naïve, but I think it is more beneficial than dangerous. These blogposts demonstrate my growing sense of simple, healthy optimism, unlike some friends like XR.

— Lee Kuan Yew, Rahul, and my dad are all optimists despite adversities

— Resilience — is the sister of optimism, even if unsophisticated.

— courage and risk-taking

Too much unsophisticated optimism leads to reckless risk taking (1997 commodity trading)

However, without optimism and courage, Singapore would be /dead in the water/.

America is another leading example.

— detach

The optimist can develop unhealthy, unrealistic attachments, and hold on too tight to something.

##my unconventional choices #optimist #eg@@

I’m sure some of my unconventional choices backfired, but today’s focus is on the successes.

  • [o] 文化程度 in spouse ??????? No I Chose a girl not highly educated but with decent learning attitudes, able to /instill/ the right attitude into my kids
  • [o] 老牌资本主义 U.S./Europe/Australia ????? No I Chose the upstart Singapore. Like my dad, I remain optimistic about Singapore government. See my email drafted around 2020 National Day
  • [f] big, new house on high floor in quiet clean estate ??? No I Chose a small, run-down hdb home in a noisy location
  • [fo] SG local private properties ??? No I chose multiple small overseas prop in very emerging countries. I focused on current yield rather than windfall
  • [go] stable VP job in a big bank ????? No I chose contractor career. Am optimistic about job security.
    • What I got? peace, security.
  • [go] You can’t remain a hands-on guy at your age. Need to improve leadership and comm ??????? No I chose to remain hands-on dev.
    • What I got? dev-till-70
  • develop interpersonal comm skills such as chitchat ??? No I chose to focus on written English esp. vocab
  • build personal network ?? No I never did it on purpose.
  • [w] take care of your appearance like hair, skin… and don’t look so old, as wife told me ??? No I chose to focus on wellness including waistline, stamina
    • What I got? many wellness habits
  • [w] pay attention to your breath ? No I chose to focus on dental health
    • What I got? more “sunshine” on dental health
  • [o] In the U.S. you must embrace driving ??? No I chose to stay in places that don’t need a car. I relied on a bicycle.  Am optimistic that I can limit or remove car dependency if I choose my location.
    • What I got? more healthy lifestyle, carefree in terms of car ownership
  • [??.. =the more question marks, the more doubt I have about the conventional wisdom]
  • [w=wellness]
  • [g=gz]
  • [f=per finance]
  • [o=demonstrates my optimism]

[20]G5 WinnBets :long-term impact@ livelihood[def2]

k_X_power_descriptor  k_tectonic

See also

Distinct from those above, this blogpost focuses on big personal “bets” — the big decisions we make throughout our career, with profound long-term impacts esp. on family livelihood. (Singapore government used to make technology bets). A few of my winning bets discussed here relate to ffree, carefree,,

Granted none of these wins is eternal, but they stand out from smaller wins. This Group of bets had a /disproportionate/ contribution to my precious carefree life (in the current phase), and my family long-term security in livelihood [1].

Note the risk of oth. This risk would be acceptable if this list is kept below 5.

Note the pff big bets are now moved to 20-punch card .

  • — the biggest winning bets. The more specific the better
  • chose ZLH as wife — 勤俭, 不苛求, 本分. This bet is beyond ranking and should not be ranked.
  • #1 citizenship — chose SG citizenship for all family members, giving up China citizenship
    • bought enhanced medishields + elderShield early, before the offerings became less attractive.
  • #2 U.S. — chose to enter U.S. and WallSt, even though rather late in the game. I chose U.S. as my 2nd “frontline”, rather than HK/China, Canada, Australia, UK. Switching to WStC + real-time Trading tech in 2010.
  • #3a WStC — chose to remain in Wall St contract path for longevity, rather than the traditional VP career path
  • #3b coreJava — more robust (longevity) than c++, jxee, web dev,, Better marketDepth. Plays to my advantage of theoretical, low-level QQ.
    • in 2006 I bet on java .. branching out from Unix/DBA , perl, LAMP, web java -> coreJava4trading
  • #4 in 1999 (decisively) branching out early to dotcom SWE, leaving the engineering sector, then to Unix admin (non-coding). SWE earn more than semiconductor engineers.
  • — other winning bets
  • in 2010 chose to resign from GS, ignoring deMunk’s departure
  • 2017 re-entering U.S. .. leaving the comfort zone, choosing Jay.Hu and getting priority date done
  • MLP job .. was a tactical choice, but it turned out to be a big winning bet (in terms of work-life balance etc)
  • Chose to give my kids a Chinese language education, saving a bundle compared to the Chinese American families.
  • chose to buy overseas properties with current yield
  • NUS — chose NUS, a growing brand
  • UChicago — I chose to invest hugely into my UChicago credential and gained a lifelong prestige , but “livelihood” impact is limited to the CV.
    • To a lesser extent, my NUS credential also appreciated in value over the decades since I “bought”.
  • chose market data domain + bond math domain — almost evergreen domains
  • English — in 1992 (and even after A-levels) I chose to embrace English as a lifelong skill despite insurmountable challenges

— [1] livelihood – 生计

In this context, “livelihood/生计” means … Survival, making ends meet, including those common disasters like job loss (including involuntary retirement ) or medical bills, but there are many derailers too big to protect. See t_ffreeLimitation.

##cancer++: persistent stressors,relieves #citizenship+optimism

 


k_tectonic … k_quietime

See also

Cancer[+stroke,heart diseases…] is one the most realistic threats to longevity. In my case, the #1 manageable factor may not be diet, sleep,,, but chronic stress.

I think anxieties and worries are different forms of stress. Anger is a growing form of stress. Anger often comes with loss of control.

Medical literature often mention short-term stress, like fight-or-flight. Short term stress is not so harmful. Chronic stress is. I will list the /true/ persistent stressors — where I have suffered real, heavy blows, over extended periods of my life.

  • 1. PIP; damaged goods; bonus stigma
  • .. frustration at work
  • 2. kids /developmental/ issues. Academic benchmark problems are usually tip of an iceberg.
  • .. subsided after the bloody psle

Strangely, I didn’t feel hit really long and hard by worries about cholesterol, exclub,,,

— Are these items below cancer-stress sources?

  • hazardous accidents like criminal charge, investment woes,,, # not persistent not carcinogenic
  • job hunting when on the bench — carcinogenic stress for many peers, but not for me.
  • job insecurity — Remember the /relentless stress/ on millions of Singapore workers during covid19 — carcinogenic stress for many peers, but not for me. Mental health became widespread concern.
  • Green Card issues
  • FOMO i.e. left-behind by (wrong) “peers” # a disappointment but no longer an anxiety
  • transient-recurring anxiety due to disruption to my digital dependencies: laptop/gmail/wpress//

— In terms of cancer-stress relieveS and protectionS, virtually everything valuble address livelihood

  • G3: arguably My #1 relief is my cashflow high ground
  • G3: my wellness habits and blessings
  • G3: my IV body-building for WallSt contract market
  • G5: favor contract jobs and avoid bonus-driven, performance-driven teams. My dev70, the envy of my peers, is built on the WallSt contract market
  • G7: my SG citizenship — providing long-term and deep confidence
  • G7: therapeutic blogging, self-healing, demanding lots of quietime. I need to be gentle and forgiving on my tendency for overthink.
  • G9: resilience, unsophisticated optimism — I have shown some over the years.
  • G22: listening friends including grandpa
  • G9: See also ## layers@buffer⇒security #annual leave