Tag: T_misPerception

see open blog

##G3deep一叶障目 misperception

Posted on by tiger40490

k_soul_search

Abraham Maslow explored perceptionOfReality in self-actualization. I like the concept of perceptionOfReality [and 一叶障目/ tunnel vision], but this blogpost is likely to remain forgettable, unless we overinvest mental energy to make it slightly less forgettable.

— one of the deepest, most prevalent and poisonous mis-perceptions is the wrong peer group

Brank is not something I absolutely NEED in order to feel completely satisfied with my life.

OC-effectiveness is not for my role.

— BMI=sole yardstick

== The above are some of the most acute pains, where I need “1stAid” ==
— Another deep-rooted mis-perception is the count of ‘burn’ hours in my spare time. See beating up myself over fuck`ROTI

This prejudiced perception/framework has long dominated my weekend planning, my self-review, … but is it holistic or even fair?

— most  erosive, decimating mis-perception in my psychological “system” is PIP, the fixation on the one manager’s assessment of me. This one manager (such as deMunk) can override all of my colleagues + other managers combined. More fundamentally, this person’s view wipes out my self-assessment. 一叶障目.
— m2m return as the only yardstick in equity investment
— China dating fixation on 1) 身高 and 2) 文化背景.
— parents’ fixation on benchmark exams
— net worth, top schools

— necessity for car ownerhip in Sgp

brkaway ^mellw ^blindFOMO ^wrongPrio ^misPceptn

Posted on by tiger40490

 

k_miswanting_blindFOMO … k_mellow

Eskimo languages have more *phrases* to describe snow because snow is improtant to their lives. Similarly, I have multiple powerDescriptors because the /subject/ is close to my heart.

— t_wrongPriority .. (a generic phrase) is related but is focused on the wrong priorities of my peers, while T_ska (a more specific phrase) usually about myself
— k_miswanting_blindFOMO .. see blind_FOMO[def]: TJ.Lin@Chn young techie #breakaway
— T_breakaway .. is related, but self-knowledge doesn’t always mean breakaway from mainstream
breakaway .. specifically about a bandwagon or brainwash
breakaway .. more decisive and more complete than t_mellow
— mellow .. shorter tag but more vague than wrongPriority/misPerception
mellow .. suggests a gradual learning journey
mellow .. related to stress, unlike t_misPerception
— ska .. is focused on self-knowledge

broad-stroke characterizatn @学业/HK-expert #wife

Posted on by tiger40490

In broad strokes, I used to describe my wife as notHighlyEducated, but today (X’mas 2021) I told a NCH counsellor “Actually she has a diploma and worked as a preschool teacher, so I was wrong to say she was not well educated”.

In broad strokes, I always described my sister as … not a strong student and didn’t go to a top school. In reality, in some subjects she was possibly a strong student. These details are missed in the broad strokes.

In broad strokes, my wife described boy’s P5/P6 teacher as “graduated from RGS”. She also described LZ.Yu’s 2 gifted kids as NUS-High top students. Well, I don’t know what prestigious college branding they would get in the end.

In broad strokes, I tend to assume international students are more motivated in colleges.

I feel in East Asian societies, such characterizations are powerful and effective, because people are very used to hearing/reading them. The general pubic don’t (care to) know that Princeton/Harvard are not so strong in Comp Science research, so broad stroke characterizations favor the big brands.

— my kids
In broad strokes, I used to describe my son as average in Math, but in late 2021 I realized he is above average (among his cohort) in math, either in Singapore or across developed countries. My broad strokes are too broad .. those characterizatios were implicitly based on myself and the China students either at his age or my age.

In broad strokes, I used to describe my son’s Chinese as very weak, due to effort deficiency. Now I think his speaking/reading skills are well-above average in his Singapore cohort. His writing is not as bad as my earlier characterization. Those Broad strokes are misleading.

In broad strokes, I often describe my daughter as strong in Ch/En but not so strong in math. The latter characterization is possibly unfair to her.

— self-characterization .. In broad strokes, I always describe my math/physics as strong; I used to portray my academic image as “top student up to high school”, but after the UChicago renaissance, I can reuse the broad strokes “top student from primary school to UChicago”. See also

Q: how do I feel about the broad strokes?
A: I know the details, so I don’t need to use broad strokes to “impress myself”. But paradoxically, as I keep using this broad-stroke characterization to present myself to others, it reinforced a positive self-image.

Q: is the positive self-image exaggerated, weakened in the center, 金玉其外败絮其中 and harmful?
A: this self-image is substantiated with certified transcript.

In conclusion, the broad strokes actually help me 1) build a reputation and 2) maintain self-esteem. Now I have a better appreciation of the UChicago brand value, which is higher than CMU, NYU .. in broad strokes !

— top experts (any domain) in US/Japan/Germany
Depending on the field, each of us tends to assume U.S. top experts are world-class in that field.

I think only 2 other countries, Japan and Germany, are universally considered leaders in virtually all fields.

Britain could be a #4. Russia and China are perceived as less integrated into the international community
France? Not perceived as a scientific nation
Most European countries are too small in terms of population.

For all other countries, their national experts are less trusted internationally.

In my first and only visit to Thailand (with my dad), the tour guide brought us to a snake farm, selling snake oil. The presenter was a medical doctor from Hongkong (accent-wise, probably mainland Chinese medical professional working or trained in Hongkong). As soon as we heard he is from Hongkong, we we started paying attention. I asked my father why a Hongkong doctor in a Thailand snake farm.  He said “so that Chinese tourists would believe it”.

I thought: medical professionals confined to SG market

Posted on by tiger40490

background: I am now feeling blessed to enjoy the low-cost carefree comfortable[1] life in Singapore. However, for decades I felt superior to doctors who can’t make a living outside the tiny city of Singapore. Here’s my reconciliation, mostly related to livelihood:

  • both doctors and people like I can aim lower and choose stable income, not rising income
  • I no longer seek career growth or leadership
  • brbr, Fuller wealth .. are the foundations of my carefree ezlife. Inflation is addressed by my “portfolio”.

[1] I didn’t write “low-cost good life” because of conflicting connotations

— what if Singapore declines?
I’m not 30 any more, so if this starts to happen in my 50’s I can cope even without leaving Singapore.

 

[16]self-efficacy: boy^my yoga

Posted on by tiger40490

see post on green zone

I guess boy doesn’t believe he could achieve full marks by working hard. No student with this disbelief would work hard towards full marks.

example — I don’t believe I can improve my flexibility with yoga at home, so I don’t have the motivation.

example — my sister was not a hardworking student as I was. In contrast, I could see that my effort could lead to good marks and good grasp of each subject.

example — In most of my jobs, I don’t try and get to know my manager better and have small talks because I don’t believe I could improve the relationship.

example — overweight individuals understand losing weight is very good for them, in numerous ways, but why they don’t have enough motivation to control diet or get exercise? One factor is self-efficacy. Consider Deepak CM

 

3Y^5Y undergrad: any difference@@ #Nigel.Chan

Posted on by tiger40490

Q: TsingHua engineering Bachelor’s degree took some of my peers 5 years. I felt proud for them as the 5Y degree was a badge of honor. However, If you look at the difference made by the extra year, are these graduates stronger or just delayed by a year?

A: I would say delayed, not necessarily stronger. That extra year can get you a reputable Master’s degree from reputable universities such as my alma mater UChicago. My other alma mater NUS engineering also awards Bachelor’s + Master’s together in 4.5 years. These universities have comparable academic reputation to TsingHua, often higher!

Q: NUS Comp science Bachelors can graduate in 3 years. If you look at the difference due to the one year omission, are these graduates weaker or they saved time and money graduating faster?
A: I feel faster. Many students (me included) actually learn better on the job, so after 3Y in school + 5Y on the job, they could be more knowledgeable than a 4Y+4Y classmate.

When a TshingHua graduate and a NUS 3Y comp science graduate both go to the same company for coding interview, I would say the extra years don’t matter as much as the coding drill.

I hope my kids feel the sense of urgency and don’t waste time on some paper qualification.

— 3Y phD.. Nigel Chan, my Macq colleague, completed a PhD in 3Y, from reputable U of Sydney. What a bargain he got.
— Masters duration .. China masters take 2-3Y, but a branded masters from U.S. or U.K. can be 1Y+. To a critical observer, I think the China degree is not so worthwhile 含金量不高.

9M master’s from UChicago.. Many of my UChicago classmates graduated in 9M. Are they weaker than those who spent 2Y in a comparable master’s ? Not at all. In fact, like UChicago, Stanford Master’s can be completed in 9 months without research thesis..

UChicago, Stanford, MIT all have a 3-semester year. Each semesters has heavy (graded) assignments, (mid-term and) final exams. In contrast, British system (in SG and HK) has only 2 semesters a year and two exams. Therefore, UChicago has higher intensity than NUS. I guess it favored students like me, as I am slightly less consistent in my exam performance compared to other students.

delayed→earned higher-value degree: TsingHua^NUS #UChicago

Posted on by tiger40490

See blogpost on Kun.H, LS and other students delayed by a year.

At age 17 to 19, I felt so bad about my delay in HwaChong. Now in my 40’s, looking back I earned a degree from NUS, better-known than all the Chinese universities “they” attended.

Fundamental to this outcome is the spectacular rise (in the league table) of NUS among Asia universities.

— how about the one more year in the 5Y degree from TshingHua? Clearly it was 1Y delay, so the students graduate 1Y later but why I never had any inferiority projected-onto these classmates?

Aha .. becasue TshingHua was desirable to most of my peers in China. I simply subscribed to that preference from the mass market.

Analogy — most Singaporeans seem to prefer Singapore condos, despite the low current income. To me,  rental yield is the #1 factor, so I should NOT subscribe to the mainstream preference.

Analogy — most Chinese flat buyers prefer higher floor

Q: compare this 1Y delay in TsingHua vs my 1Y delay in HwaChong -> NUS?
A: the Chinese would think the TsingHua deal is better, because the Chinese buy that brand! On the job market outside China, I guess NUS has higher position, higher market value. English alone is a priceless advantage.
A: more importantly, NUS helped me and wife’s SG citizenship, which is worth 100 times more than a TshingHua degree.

Q: compare this 1Y delay in TsingHua vs my journey from HwaChong to UChicago?
A: in terms of branding, TshingHua is no match for UChicago. Just look at Nobel Prizes.

— TsingHua vs India Institute of Technology
( These colleges are vastly different, but it doesn’t stop people from comparing them.) They have very high standing in their respective domestic markets, but on the international competitive landscape, they are not that competitive.

— why focus so much on branding rather than quality?
Quality is too hard to compare between two colleges.

— https://www.channelnewsasia.com/commentary/failed-a-levels-academic-journey-singapore-673911 — The author (Raffles JC grad) spent 2 years in JC, then 2 or 3 years in poly, then 3 or 4 years in university. Lots of delays, but not necessarily a disaster, IFF the person handles it well. He probably graduated from university in his late 20s or early 30s. In the U.S. I was told many people go to college in their 30s, after they figure out what they want to learn.

young men’s(wrong)role model: 高富帅

Posted on by tiger40490

“曾经有个非常不错的三十五岁哥们，人长得那是没话说，工作也好，车子两部，房子三套，即便算不上“高富帅”，也可以跻身金领的行列了” —  https://www.163.com/dy/article/ER52JEG605452UOU.html, a common role model for students not only in China.

— ! car is a liability, not an asset. Since this guy is unmarried, 2-car lifestyle is a waste of resources, unjustified,
— ! quantity vs value of rEstate. See also HF.Sun discussion
— ! concentration risk.. it’s unwise/questionable to buy 3 homes in the same city. Better diversify to commercial properties, stocks, gold, bonds
— As a student, what would I envy him for?

  1. Sexual success
  2. salary. Without salary, his assets are a mere “handout” [lottery, inheritance] and won’t last

women with Grade-A flexibility≠stronger than me

Posted on by tiger40490

Those teachers who criticize my flexibility are invariably comparing me to females, never my mere-mortal male peers.

That lady with grade-A flexibility

  • faces higher risk of injury. Chair yoga teacher told me many examples. I guess it’s rare to see an individual both very flexible and very strong.
  • eg: she met many flexible (but not strong) women
  • eg: Many athletes and dancers have injuries…. often push to their limit and over-stretch.
  • may not be able to make a living as a yoga instructor, as Ankur could
  • may not derive satisfaction and self-esteem from her superior flexibility
  • may be poor in balancing, strength and endurance in yoga, not even considering endurance sports
  • may not have so much willpower.
  • is probably not going to win in any yoga competition, but why bother with competition? So why feel inferior to them?
  • enjoys yoga just as I enjoy jogging. However, in terms of cardio fitness and weight improvement yoga is ineffective, so if I must choose I would rather have the jogging advantage than the yoga advantage.

My self-knowledge advantage helps me put up with the negative peer comparison and keep going on yoga.

I have hypolordosis (reduced lumbar lordosis). I once imagined that if I could surgically sever some connective tissue in my lower back, then I would be able to bend forward “like them”. However, whatever is too short in my lowerback is still vital for my body. I am grateful to that piece, when I can swim, cycle, climb stairs, jog, squat, twist, side-bend, sit-up…

Chinese/Korean couple: %%assumptions =unfounded #ML.Jiang

Posted on by tiger40490

The less you know someone, the more you assume… Remember HY.Cai #sinking

ML.Jiang once told me about some classmates. A Chinese national and a Korean national living in Singapore as a couple, who supposedly spoke Japanese at home!

I was impressed. Immediately I imagined that they speak mostly Japanese between them everyday, and their Japanese fluency is equal to their mother tongue.

Well, DaShan the Canadian in China is one in probably 10,000 foreigners who speak such fluent Chinese. So to a Japanese national, both of them probably sound non-Japanese.