I wouldn’t say he is so lazy. Perhaps he is more motivated than many kids of another country.
I wouldn’t see his poor clarity of thinking and pattern recognition in math.
I wouldn’t feel so negative about his tech career
I wouldn’t see his basic arithmetic weakness created by years of neglect.
which of these two scenarios would be a worse nightmare?
If ah-boy is just mediocre, then most likely he didn’t “try enough”. My harsh attitude (在他心目中的形象) would not help him improve (I tend to overestimate my influence and power over him) but could threaten the precious bonding.
Q: am I more focused on grades or concept?
A: At P2, I used to focus on concepts. Now I feel focusing on concepts probably means he won’t get the marks. To get the marks, he has to endure uncomfortable amount of practice. See my chat with Sakamoto teacher…
I guess that many math fun learning websites (U.S., Australia…) probably focus on pupils’ interests (intrinsic motivation), not exams. I think exams in SG require much heavier tedious practice. To score in exams, you need speed, pattern-recognition, and avoiding mistakes at every step. You need lots of practice. 又快又准。
JackZ: Given your son’s lack of interest in wordy problems, U.S. culture would probably emphasize encouragement rather than forced practice.
Heavy homework, tough practice is actually common across U.S. schools such as my UChicago master’s program, but probably not common before high school.
In Singapore, it is quite heavy starting at Grade 4.
At the higher leve, proficiency is a requirement at the U.S. exams, similar to Singapore exams at the same level.
I feel I need to focus more on motivation than benchmark. The fixation on academic ranking is frustrating because it’s ALWAYS relative to fellow students.
I have zero control over fellow students’ performance, abilities, effort….
Grace Dong seemed to suggest that poor grade is always due to limited effort. I feel that point of view ignores the relative ranking. If you double your effort but other people also double their effort, then you would still score low in the bell curve !
1. In NY, 2019, I decided to come home and reduce boy’s math workload — saturation, eroding confidence/interest..
The “perseverance” SMS is directly against my plan.
The real obstacle is not brain power, but will power and (intrisic/extrinsic) motivation.
2. Then I changed my view. I felt the basic arithmetic skill needs lots of practice, but wordy problems are less practice-based. However if your goal is not the concepts but the exam, then in order to score, you still need a lot of practice. See am I more focused@marks^concept@@
3. Now I’m kinda giving up. Face time is too tough. Losing my cool. So I leave it to the teachers. So now I have no direction no guiding principle.
in Singapore primary school math, the notorious wordy problems have a negative effect, if not an overall negative aspect in the Singapore education system.
It has a negative effect on my wife and me. If we are in the U.S. the math training may be too simple but no such unnecessary anxiety.
For years I try to be rational about these wordy problems but I find myself trapped, unable to escape.
Since c++US days, I have told myself to avoid this topic.
jolt: his math skills overall, if benchmarked in U.S., might be an A-.
His wordy problem performance might be B+.
His SG classmates’ math standard, if benchmarked in China, might be a B, because I know from experience that China’s math standard is higher.
China students would look down on these SG counterparts because “their tough problems are so easy for us. They are just hopeless.”
It was an experiment comparable to my msfm, my c++, my c#, my overseas investment… Experiment are risky in terms of disappointments.
His renzi was (is) strategic to me. I took a calculated risk.
In hind sight, I had no better use of my spare time. I couldn’t save my spare time in a freezer for later use.
Without these experiments, could we discover ….?
Shanyou’s son has academic talents in high school but refused to study. He “only” managed to earn a half-scholarship to study comp science in Boston University. Shanyou felt “what a waste — he could have got into ivy league”.
I’m feeling the same about my son. As I criticize CSY for his parenting attitude/perception, I have to admit that I am in the same trap — 五十步笑百步.
This is one of the elements of reality I have to accept.