not strictly school testable content
Q: specifically, what do I want dabao to gain from this crazy Singapore math education?
— Chinese — because in the U.S. there’s no learning environment.
English? No. he may grow up an untrained writer but he will be proficient in English as an everyday language. Grammar, vocab will be fine.
— Math — he needs foundation skills. I feel his foundation is sound so far, though his don’t-care attitude is indistinguishable from a weak foundation.
Note math is a top priority in U.S. schools as well as Singapore schools.
See growing gap behind those academic kids ] math. Beware the difference between contrived problem solving vs practical skills including
If I choose one question from a P5 book, the other 8 questions on the same page tend to create immense negative pressure, because they are not easy for my son.
They might have equal educational value as my chosen question, but I don’t (and should not) have to deal with more than one tough question at a time.
There’s more fun devising and refining my problems. I feel more engaged, focused, in the zone.
For non-word problems, I think i should support perseverance. My arithmetic drill is doable and requires perseverance; Probably ditto for the easy word problems (some at P3/P4 levels);
For word problems, tough choice for me. I feel encouraging him to solve tougher word problems sounds like 拔苗助长
I kinda see Mrs Goh’s view. Boy is not trying enough, and relying on other people to do the thinking for him.
Perseverance (willpower) is a questionable practice and can fail. In this case, teacher is very sure about it and wife also believes it.
Some word problems that require equation .. he has no confidence so perseverance is possibly ineffective.
— am not good at yoga, but I make a serious effort trying. I guess relatively few people are like me. Karma
I guess for my son the math practice feels like yoga to some extent??
compare the piano perseverance?
邓丽君 was weak in math as a pupil but showed perseverance.
— key to perseverance — 温和
— fatigue and 厌学?
— confrontation, strain, losing-cool
— compare the P1 spelling experiences — 3 hours to learn 10 words. I tried teaching him the patterns but completely failed as he was not engaged.
Here I’m excluding physical skills, but “learning” doesn’t exactly equal classroom learning.
I would say whenever my son reads a book he is learning something, not always academic.
when my son applies his mind on a map, he is learning something.
When my son applies his mind on an electronic gadget, he is also learning something non-trivial.
With non-academic kids, I think it’s extremely important (almost life-n-death) to find their strengths + xxxq [1], after we accept their academic limitations. Remember Rahul’s pointers …
Note ‘academic limitations’ don’t always mean low technical talent. I think it’s possible for a non-academic student to later excel in technical domains like programming or applied science.
[1] defined in another blogpost
I feel my son is perhaps not academic or technical, but I need to keep in mind the possibility that he might become more technical.
There are (implicit/explicit) competitions at various stages in our lives, starting in primary school. My son may improve his “ranking” in later competitions. The earlier competitions tend to be academic and theoretical. The tech interviews are also fairly academic — my strength.
k_X_power_descriptor
Losing my cool is an observable risk, witnessed over and over again. It’s naive and unwise of me to brush it aside.
Losing my cool is closely related to micro-managing
losing my cool by saying harsh words is still more controlled than smashing/breaking. Worst form is physical punishment in a rage.
Freak-out is a stronger alternative to losing-my-cool, and is more versatile
Before losing my cool, I sometimes let off steam by smacking his buttock. It is mildly confusing to boy but I think it helps me.
— signs of losing my cool
Bill Chen pointed out that at least at middle (+elementary) school level, U.S. system is more holistic than China system. Many of his friends benefited. I said my son is not academic and would fare better in the U.S. system. He agreed.
I said even at high school level, U.S. system is still more holistic than China system, since college admission is only 50% based on academics, mostly GPA and sometims SAT. Bill agreed. The academic benchmark used is not always a national standard benchmark such as SAT. I guess U.S. colleges knows that SAT is poor predictor of success in college.
Junli told me some colleges said SAT score is optional and will be considered iFF submitted. I feel good to hear this for my son. I think for this reason, YLZ’s two kids both scored very high in SAT but still not very impressive to the U.S. colleges. The Singapore system is mostly focused on academics but U.S. system is more holistic.
When I asked about “50%” quoted earlier, Liu Yong pointed out school projects, leadership roles .. are important admission criteria.
Overall, I feel U.S. system is likely better for my son. More non-academic programs. Singapore system expects high motivation at too early an age, when my son is not ready.
— as I told Josh
I told Josh … The “breakthrough” I will wait for – when my son starts showing any serious, sustained dedication to anything meaningful, I will feel relieved that I made the right decision to bring him to the U.S.
However, serious motivation about something meaningful may not be such an important breakthrough. Academic benchmark is a dangerous trap including coding competitions.
I used to feel perhaps boy would move up to become a top student later in high school, just like Bill Chen or Grace Dong. Now I feel we need to dampen down that hope because only a minority of students go through that. My sister didn’t.
I used to think boy might be good with programming, but now I think it is not so likely.
Grandpa said don’t hold up hope for a technical track. Possibly a business education is more likely. Possibly a career path similar to Aunt Gennifer’s.
Grandpa said repeatedly that U.S. community college is fine. Now I feel the top 2 Singapore universities might be too tough to get in.
Now I foresee my boy may enroll in a community college (or higher), intern at some unknown firms, graduate with some common business degree, and join a main-street company. Meanwhile, his peers may excel in various ways. It would be tough for me and wife to accept, but we will accept.
Grandpa pointed out the parenting priorities 1) health 2) character 3) learning
Now I feel this is wisdom.
I will put academics (not necessarily benchmark) as #4. I think other parents may put academics a bit higher.