I can understand most of the negative feedback. Some of them are within my capabilities but some aren’t.

Refuse to feel weak, inadequate, inferior, or old. Some past jobs are also too demanding — part of the GS job, part of the Citi-muni job.

Welcome the opportunity to start again somewhere else, though I will not give up improving myself on this job. The effort and attitude to keep improving myself is good for my spirit, my image, my self-image

It’s possible that managers may have already concluded I am not fit for the job (I won’t speculate) but that would be understandable and I will handle that situation well.

It’s painful but we can convert that to less hazardous energy, with a mental shift.

Some may say the situation is painful, but I will be kind, supportive to myself just as I am to my wife or my son. I won’t beat myself.

I like the let-go tips in https://btv-open.dreamhosters.com/2009/12/13/avoid-the-pain-in-this-tough-situation-and-live-with-peace-of-mind/ so I added a few:

• I need (and have) the serenity to accept the things I can’t change.
• Yes we CAN live through this tough situation with peace. Much less severe than health issues
• put in 80% effort rather than straining myself with 100% effort, which may not help a lot but puts too much strain on self and family
• don’t worry if manager still complains about efficiency — i have done my best so nothing more to strive for.
• Do what I can and leave the rest to God
• layoff is not bad for me and family, seriously
• Xia Rong’s suggestion — separate my effort. On work projects, set a clear goal to keep the job; Outside the office, work on the US relocation. If unable to keep the job then it’s fine.