Depending on the personality, the age and the situation, sometimes it’s effective to reassure our kids (or tell ourselves, or tell our spouse) that there’s no minimum requirement on your effort. Any try is good.

Best eg: invite someone to sing something

Sometimes it’s more effective to highlight the reality that unless we put up a good fight, result is bound to be painful. So no choice. 背水一战, 破釜沉舟. Sometimes we have to give this message to our kids. We often feel tempted to exaggerate it. I think sometimes kids can tell. I now think it’s better to be truthful with our kids.