k_rmSelf_vs_xpSelf

The rmSelf^rmSelf framework is a unique lens, but not exactly front and center to my understanding of wellbeing. Other frameworks are more relevant, such as 4 def@success, livelihood, life chances, Maslow’s pyramid. However, this framework has an advantage — a book, based on published and respected research. 10 years later, most of my home-grown frameworks would fade away.

xpSelf^rmSelf is the #1 useful framework I picked up from D.Kahneman’s book. I will use this framework many times, perhaps through my life, so I will use two abbreviations

• xpSelf=experiencing self
• rmSelf=remembering self .. rm means remove in unix, but here it has the opposite meaning. It’s the same pattern where rural Chinese families name their new baby boys after worthless things like shit or dirt.

Disclaimer : Any measurement (using rmSelf or xpSelf surveys) must follow precise definitions. D.Kahneman used the hedonimeter [DRM] for xpSelf’s wellbeing; he used CSASS for rmSelf’s evaluation. These definitions largely match my loose usage of the terms.

— important phrases ..

• satisfaction .. about longer-term goals and needs. When we evaluate our lives, we evaluate satisfaction.
• pleasures/pains .. more short-term, more at-the-moment
• bliss .. more short-term
• comfort/comfortable .. free of pain and bad mood. Mostly short-term. However, such an individual can be unsatisfied about a long-term goal. As such she is uncomfortable only when she thinks about it.
• happiness .. can be long-term or short-term. As Vague as “well-being”. I seldom use this word in my serious discussions.

— T_rmXp ^ T_Kahneman tags:
rmXp tag is more specific and generally excludes blogposts on sweeping evaluations.
— eg: my outings with boy .. the rmSelf often comes to a negative evaluaiton[tcost, poor measurable ROTI,,], but my xpSelf often had a good time.
— eg: rmSelf’s evaluation on strategic value of my xx
— eg: workout classes .. one of the best illustrations.
— eg: exp recon .. satisfies the xpSelf, but tcost/Benefit ratio may look obsessive , to the rmSelf [evaluator of Benefit]
Sugg: control tcost; increase Benefit by using the results “everywhere”
— eg: weekend hours .. don’t need to be more than 1% burn. (The burn is mostly rmSelf.)
Could I have some meaningful, non-empty weekends for the xpSelf?
I tend to evaluate (rmSelf) my weekends, neglecting xpSelf.

— eg: movies … 8 out of 10 movies are pure pleasure for the xpSelf, and largely forgettable to the rmSelf. Its evaluation of time utilization is therefore unfavorable. Luckily, I often inject some “ROTI elements” to satisfy the rmSelf, like workout, lotus pose, laptop, reading.
— eg: recreational stock trading .. the evaluative rmSelf is harsh, but the xpSelf enjoys a good recreation. Not sure which blogpost to update
— eg: calorie restriction

• with aaa, the xpSelf has a tougher time, possibly “miserable” time. So if you really want to implement the restriction, do invest to remove aaa, and reduce the suffering.
• In this case, I actually prefer the xpSelf’s suffering forgotten[4]. In reality, the rmSelf tends to remember the Peak of the struggle and the ending, and forgets thousand of daily battles (multiple battles a day).
• As to the rmSelf’s _evaluation_ of calorie restriction, I would say “tough memory, positive result, possibly unsustainable.” This situation is NOT decision-making by rmSelf.

[4] This is “achievable” only with Kahneman’s potion to wipe out all memory of a surgery’s pain. It is comparable to a very realistic and long dream ([[Inception]]) in which the xpSelf experiences intense feelings, but the rmSelf basically doesn’t care. Remember Saito’s endless dream towards the end of [[Inception]]?