4 def@success

Posted on by tiger40490 rendered_on [ Thu, 6 Mar 2025 ] 12:53 UTC

 

k_rmSelf_vs_xpSelf  .. k_tectonic .. k_def_of_success

See also [20] y I feel successful #le2wife 

There are several meanings of success. This blogpost uses many Chinse phrases, because the concept of “success” is subtle, complex, steeped in culture.

Q: At the deathbed, which definition of success is important?
A: ezlife, and perhaps zqbx[including whether I like myself]

[p=a relevant def@success from a parenting viewpoint]

— successC .. the most CCommon, CCConventional definition, the CCConspicuous [visible] definition, a definition based on peer-CCComparison and CCompetition. Success can mean exclub based on conventional, materialistic yardsticks .. Many in my cohort still strive for power, position (brank), prestige/recognition/pride, money, OPE[otherPeople’sEnvy],,, At my age I have slowly moved on.  Semi-retired. kinda mellowing up. fat-n-happy. Compared to them, I now allocate more t$ to wellness, career longevity, recreations,, See average GP=considered more”Successful”than swEngr, even without power, brank.

##[21]visibleGrowth plateau: #江河日下 offers a more in-depth explanation of successC. Note this definition of “success” is too self-centered, more like 野心, and not noble as implied by 胸怀大志/胸无大志.

As a parent, I don’t need my kids to join an exclub. An average income is good enough for them. More important to me as parent is their wellness, livelihood (different from income!)

Web2.0 salary figures #realistic described RMB 1200k/Y “BAT” salary for a 20-something China SWE. Exclub! More than enough successC, but I would guess insufficient successE. Zero successL. Sophia Cui shared some observations in a 2021 email discussion…

— [p] successE/failureE .. success can mean ezlife [4]  with harmony, on a bedrock of wellness + well-cushioned livelihood [well-off by the yardsticks of BRBR and Fuller Wealth] ….. SuccessE is my recent favorite definition, a breakaway from conventional yardsticks of success.

[4] “carefree” as a yardstick is more transient.

Livelihood .. The specifics of ezlife is related to livelihood and a burn rate benchmarked to 80% median household income. Without these yardsticks and numerical criteria, ezlife is too vague and too subjective.

Harmony .. with the self, family, and “nature” should be part of ezlife. Harmony in the family requires Communication channel, bonding with kids. Mellowing up is a more specific phrase.  Harmony implies serenity, lots of painful trade-off’s, let-go’s, reconciliations of conflicts.

Using this definition, I think I could blow away the competition from my ex-classmates and leave them in the dust. I probably achieved some form of this success during my mid-40s.

Life_chances … are a fundamental element of successE, but in my view 1% less important than it is to successC, because successE is more modest (re Khmer villagers), less ambitious/greedy. (Obviously, my concepts of Life_chances and successE are vague.)

SuccessE/FailureE (compared to the other 3) is relatively attentive to xpSelf.

— [p] failureZ/successZ

The ezlife definition (or another definition) of success can breed excessive /self-complacency/ (死于安乐), and fat-n-happy. We don’t want to waste our life in a comfort zone of /decadent/ ezlife. That’s the basic need for this separate definition.

— successL .. (legacy, lasting achievements) success can mean lasting achievement …. an extension of the idea of project success, judged on either a specific, objective, or measurable target.

SuccessL is mostly about the evaluative rmSelf. However, if (not when) you are in the flow of successL, your xpSelf would have a great time.

eg: https://www.carecorner.org.sg/our-story. CareCornerSG was started in 1981 and have to work hard and stay relevant in the 2020s. It will one day stop or merge with another organization, likely forgotten afterwards. The legacy, the lasting achievement is felt in the clients’ life.

eg: Jack Welch was successful, but how about successL? His legacy is tied to General Electric, so when GE falls few would remember him.

Life_chances .. are a limiting factor to successL (Perhaps this sentence can be deleted.)

— feeling superior.. each time I feel lucky cf my peers (same age or otherwise), the trigger is usually

  • comp + benefits
  • workload, low stress, low politics
  • investment gains including rEstate
  • welfare .. quality healthcare at affordable cost (or free as in Canada)
  • low tax .. wealth tax
  • low inflation, strong currency
  • my edu credentials .. ascent of NUS
  • moat, career longevity
  • really nice wellness facilities near office or home

These are mostly successC components. Similarly, each sinking experience has a trigger event in pff, brank, double-income, academic kids, WCBA,,,

Jolt: There are more important tectonic plates, but no peer-comparison — wellness, family harmony [marriage], long-living parents, successZ, recreations, engaging job,,,

— quiet idle time touches on successZ, successsE

— Yong.Liu (刘墉) is a valuable case study because I have spent hundreds of hours reading his works, which represent 10% of my current book collection (excluding tech or magazines), by far the “biggest” author.

successL: My dismissive (biased) view .. Among all writers, his successL [readership, popularity,,,] is perhaps among the top 0.01%, but still his successL will last perhaps 50 years. New authors over the next 200Y would repackage the same “wisdom”, but in then then contemporary context, so his books would fall out of fashion and become legacy in the libraries.

I guess his offspring are a more important legacy in his mind.

successC: His (decades of) reputation and modest and decent financial success are no match for the successC of thousands of tycoons. However, his successC is “good enough” by most standards.

There’s no need to benchmark his successC or successL. His “4 successes” are all good.

Q: (I don’t know his artistic prowess, but) his writing demonstrates  incisive insight, so how did his high talent help him succeed?
A: it gave him successC and successL from an early age.