Beyond drugs, there are similar bad influences in the U.S. community. Here are my practical strategies, in no particular order:
- choose strict schools. Pay the price, but see luxury/special edu: unaffordable4%%middle class
- join a class as an older student
- Choose Chinese neighborhood like Edison (Honglin’s suggestion). Accept the long commute.
- protect the bond with kids, so they open up to me when needed. Jack Zhang pointed out I need time for kids.
- wife stay home to keep an eye on him for a while. During the formative years, mother has more influence than father. (If he needs constant monitoring, then consider SG.)
- focus on what we can control; recognize and accept the things beyond our control.
#1 Biggest strategy — the parachute. When needed, be decisive to relocate back to SG.
I would then have no doubt that I need to work in SG for several years, perhaps at lower salary.
Accept that both kids could be delayed by a year or two, or consider international schools.
Philosophically, Even though every decision has consequences, we are not permanently locked into the emigration decisions.
#1 safeguard — both parents staying together. “If both parents stay with the kid, things won’t go too bad.”
#9 safeguard — SG extraterritorial penalty on drug usage is a deterrent for my kids. Can be a valuable restraint and deterrent.
https://www.channelnewsasia.com/singapore/cannabis-drug-laws-outside-singapore-hair-test-cna-explains-2916026
— friends’ tips on drug abuse
- XR said he would show pictures to his kids and drive home the reality about drugs.
- In the U.S., my son could attend a religious school or charter school with strict control.
- Jack said church would be a positive “force”.
- Jack said drugs are more widespread in college than high school but I don’t know.
- Jack said early intervention is key. The earlier parents try to help their kids quit, the easier it would be.
An American teenager would be safer in SG.