Background — I told Rahul that my son’s level of effort is lower than his classmates’, despite everything we have tried. He is not fixated on the marks. There’s an abundance of Extrinsic motivators in Singapore, all tied to the test results, but they proved ineffective in the face of his heavy resistance.

Right away, Rahul suggested we try to build his “internal locus of control” i.e. the positive feedback loop linking effort and satisfying result. “Parenting by Logical Consequences”. We want him to experience, see, realize that his effort, not luck, not talent, not parents’ whim, is the real reason for the satisfying result.

Rahul suggested encouraging him on non-academic domains [1] where his resistance to “effort” is lower. Rahul said “(in N months) when he realizes the importance of studies he might come back to studies and apply himself”, drawing a “C” curve in the air.

I think grandpa also said something similar — “give him more time. wait for a few years”.

[1] How about piano, badminton, swimming,

Years ago, I also said that I wish to see one domain where he puts in effort consistently for a long time. Now I think Piano and badminton are success stories. Perhaps we can help him learn programming too, but it would take too much time — my time and his time.

Basically de-emphasize benchmark performance.

I have 51% confidence that U.S. (and Australian) systems are more natural at the primary school level. Some kids learn better in U.S. system, while other kids may learn better in the Singapore system.