k_anger_mgmt

I have memories or knowledge of Chinese parents using physical pain as discipline. Sometimes result in bruises and minor bleeding.

… luckily never as result of my actions … sigh of relief

Some of my son’s classmates and my friends were subject to routine whipping at home.

— spectrum .. Subconsciously I put those images at the end of a spectrum which includes my level of punishment in the middle section. Sometimes that end is regarded as unacceptable or criminal [1]. Other times that end is regarded as commonplace and widespread among the Chinese parents. That’s how I legitimize my acts.

[1] as a parent, I put myself into a defensive position. Other family members could become witnesses to a criminal act. Singapore police investigation officer will take up the case as long as there’s a report filed.

Therefore, low-impact, no-trauma physical punishment is safer. I always remind everyone:

• must have other adults present, as a restraint
• avoid boiling_anger. Calm anger is … acceptable.

— parent’s motivations for severe physical punishment:
anger_relief is dangerous.
corrective_discipline is acceptable. This includes “scare him”.